Pillow Talk

Night, folks.

Night, folks.

(A conversation before bedtime, in which we discuss jewelry, fear of commitment, arranged marriage, homosexuality, gender confusion, and anatomical differences between men and women. And during which I nearly choked myself trying to stifle the giggling.)

T: Mommy, why do you have to wear your wedding ring?

Me: Because it’s special to me.

T: Does Papa make you wear it?

Me: No, I like to wear it, because it’s special to me. It means I’m married.

T: I want to get married.

Me: Someday. Good night, sweetheart.

T: I don’t want to ask someone.

Me: Oh, well. Maybe someone will ask you instead.

T: I hope someone picks me.

Me: Someone will pick you. Good night, sweetheart.

T: Mommy, I hope it’s one of my friends who picks me. Not a stranger.

Me: It won’t be a stranger.

T: But what if the stranger is nice?

Me: It will probably be someone you know. Someone you love. Good night, sweetheart.

T: Will it be a girl?

Me: Umm. Probably, but maybe not.

T: Sometimes it’s a girl and sometimes people have two daddies.

Me: Yes. Sometimes they do. Good night, sweetheart.

T: I’m going to be a daddy.

Me: Yes, not anytime soon, though. Good night, sweetheart.

T: Am I a boy?

Me: Yep.

T: I might not be, you know.

Me: I’m pretty sure.

T: Sometimes girls look like boys. And sometimes boys look like girls.

Me: That’s true. But boys have penises. Good night, sweetheart.

T: Girls don’t have penises? How do they pee?

Me: They have something else. They have vaginas. Good night, sweetheart.

T: But do they pee with their baginas?

Me: Vaginas. Yes. Good night, sweetheart.

T: Do girls have bums?

Me: Yes. Everybody has a bum.

T: Everybody? Even Kitty?

Me: Yes. Everybody.

T: Good night, Mommy.

(And off he drifted to sleep, safe in the comforting thought that everybody has a bum.)


1 Comment

Filed under Not cool, Mommy

One response to “Pillow Talk

  1. Pingback: Anniversary musings | The Fun Apartment

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